Yup. Unfortunately, you read that right. We sadly live in a world where women can, legally (and in some cases, with the assistance of the legal system, via manipulation and money,) steal other people's children. Not only is this an incredibly sad situation for the mother, but it's incredibly hard on the child, especially when the child is old enough to understand what is going on.
I know someone personally who has been through this. An ex-husband who was abusive, manipulative, and used blackmail over the course of their divorce (thanks to her experiencing postpartum depression, even though she got help for it, and was not a danger,) to usurp the majority of custody from her. After fighting bitterly, tooth and nail to regain at least 50/50 custody, his mother's friendship with the judge caused her to have to pay child support (yes, with him unemployed, even though she still had 50% custody!), and then when he found a new girlfriend (whose daddy had money,) the whole situation broke apart.
The new girlfriend insinuated herself into the child's life, lavishing him with toys, knowing Mom couldn't afford to buy him everything he wanted, and that she didn't want to spoil him. She took him to Chuck-E-Cheeze weekly, paid for these lessons, and that fun time, all the while gearing up for a parental-bankrolled court battle, with her as the new stepmom. Mom didn't have a chance. The lawyers were paid, the judge was paid, and Mom was in financial hardship from debts left from the divorce and from prior court battles. Stuck now with what she considered "minimal" custody, she accepted that she would continue to pay child support, and was simply thankful she was still seeing her child.
Then the hardship continue. Trying to make ends meet, she had to choose, - child support, or food for herself and her child. Food, of course, came first. She tried to make memories with her child, her heart breaking when he started calling the stepmom "mom" too. Then the final blow came.
Sign over your rights, and keep seeing your child as you have been, or go to court and end up with supervised visitation: an hour or so every two weeks. Why? Because of money. Because the judge was paid, because the Guardian Ad Litem was paid. Because Daddy had money.
So she signed, the financial burden relieved, and then, soon after, the excuses started. "I don't like your fiance." "I don't like how you parent him." "I don't like..." Then, one day, the stepmom just decided it was time for the visits to stop. When the child was 8 years old.
The child knows how much his mother loves him. He knows how much she misses him. She told him so. She warned him what the future might bring, told him to seek her out as soon as he could. In this revelation, she learned that he was being forced to call the woman "mom," because she was jealous.
Yes, jealous.
Why? Because she learned the reason why Mom left the ex. She learned about his behaviors, learned about his philandering, learned the kind of person he really was. She learned, but she couldn't stand the thought of failing at a marriage, so she accepted it, and started striving to have a "perfect family." You know, the husband, wife, and two kids. Unfortunately, after a year, she realized: she was infertile.
Court was a second choice. Her first target was a child she'd taken in for a "friend" who was in jail. While her "friend" was trying to get things resolved, she tried to get custody of her child, as well. When that fell apart, the court battle with Mom ensued.
Why would a woman do this? In what sick, twisted world, do they think that they have any right to blackmail and strongarm another person, to steal their child from them, to take what they want, just because they have money and they want it? What is wrong with the world today, that there are people who feel so entitled, that they will do absolutely anything, no matter how immoral, to get what they want?
I weep for Mom. She misses her son terribly. Backed further and further into a corner, and yet, she had no choice. No family members that could help financially, no loans that could be taken, no credit cards. She had searched and searched for a job, applied at hundreds of different places, and was either told she was overqualified, or she never heard anything at all.
One can only hope that her child, when he gets a little older, will seek her out, will remember how much she loved him, how much she gave for him, because he began to see the truth before the end, too.
Here's to moms everywhere
I know someone personally who has been through this. An ex-husband who was abusive, manipulative, and used blackmail over the course of their divorce (thanks to her experiencing postpartum depression, even though she got help for it, and was not a danger,) to usurp the majority of custody from her. After fighting bitterly, tooth and nail to regain at least 50/50 custody, his mother's friendship with the judge caused her to have to pay child support (yes, with him unemployed, even though she still had 50% custody!), and then when he found a new girlfriend (whose daddy had money,) the whole situation broke apart.
The new girlfriend insinuated herself into the child's life, lavishing him with toys, knowing Mom couldn't afford to buy him everything he wanted, and that she didn't want to spoil him. She took him to Chuck-E-Cheeze weekly, paid for these lessons, and that fun time, all the while gearing up for a parental-bankrolled court battle, with her as the new stepmom. Mom didn't have a chance. The lawyers were paid, the judge was paid, and Mom was in financial hardship from debts left from the divorce and from prior court battles. Stuck now with what she considered "minimal" custody, she accepted that she would continue to pay child support, and was simply thankful she was still seeing her child.
Then the hardship continue. Trying to make ends meet, she had to choose, - child support, or food for herself and her child. Food, of course, came first. She tried to make memories with her child, her heart breaking when he started calling the stepmom "mom" too. Then the final blow came.
Sign over your rights, and keep seeing your child as you have been, or go to court and end up with supervised visitation: an hour or so every two weeks. Why? Because of money. Because the judge was paid, because the Guardian Ad Litem was paid. Because Daddy had money.
So she signed, the financial burden relieved, and then, soon after, the excuses started. "I don't like your fiance." "I don't like how you parent him." "I don't like..." Then, one day, the stepmom just decided it was time for the visits to stop. When the child was 8 years old.
The child knows how much his mother loves him. He knows how much she misses him. She told him so. She warned him what the future might bring, told him to seek her out as soon as he could. In this revelation, she learned that he was being forced to call the woman "mom," because she was jealous.
Yes, jealous.
Why? Because she learned the reason why Mom left the ex. She learned about his behaviors, learned about his philandering, learned the kind of person he really was. She learned, but she couldn't stand the thought of failing at a marriage, so she accepted it, and started striving to have a "perfect family." You know, the husband, wife, and two kids. Unfortunately, after a year, she realized: she was infertile.
Court was a second choice. Her first target was a child she'd taken in for a "friend" who was in jail. While her "friend" was trying to get things resolved, she tried to get custody of her child, as well. When that fell apart, the court battle with Mom ensued.
Why would a woman do this? In what sick, twisted world, do they think that they have any right to blackmail and strongarm another person, to steal their child from them, to take what they want, just because they have money and they want it? What is wrong with the world today, that there are people who feel so entitled, that they will do absolutely anything, no matter how immoral, to get what they want?
I weep for Mom. She misses her son terribly. Backed further and further into a corner, and yet, she had no choice. No family members that could help financially, no loans that could be taken, no credit cards. She had searched and searched for a job, applied at hundreds of different places, and was either told she was overqualified, or she never heard anything at all.
One can only hope that her child, when he gets a little older, will seek her out, will remember how much she loved him, how much she gave for him, because he began to see the truth before the end, too.
Here's to moms everywhere